I Don't Smoke, but My Car Did

Every time I get out of my new Honda Civic, I think, wow, there's no smoke!

There are some things in life you shouldn't get used to. Like having smoke come out of the hood of your car. My 1998 Dodge Stratus had a power steering fluid leak that seeped through the hose and burned off from the heat of the engine.

That car eventually caught on fire. I've had car mechanics tell me power steering fluid wouldn't cause a fire as it's not a flammable fluid, but who knows. Regardless, it was time for it to go.

I was ready to let it go, too. A family member really wanted me to hold onto my Stratus for as long as possible. He believed a power steering stop leak fluid would solve the problem, or that we should at least try it for a while to see if it worked. At times, it did appear to be working. I also came from a place of lack, thinking it was better to hold onto my car as long as I could than to have car payments for a new one.

Then my car broke down right in front of Weber State--the exact spot where I had a car accident three years earlier--and the mechanic said if I fixed the other issues to get the car running again, he could clean off all the crud on the engine and it shouldn't smoke anymore. The engine didn't look that dirty to me. I didn't really want to go through with it, but I talked myself into thinking, Okay, if this can work . . .

I drove my car back from the auto shop trying to feel hopeful. About a mile later, my car started smoking worse than it ever had. It was so bad, I had to pull into the Smith's parking lot to escape from the cloud of smoke and my growing embarrassment. I am shocked that no one started honking at me, as it looked like my car was seriously overheating.

After my car cooled down a bit, it didn't smoke as much. Whatever the mechanic sprayed into the engine probably left a residue that was also burning off with the still-present leak, which never stopped smoking.

It was so frustrating that I actually felt relieved a few months later when my car started on fire.

I'm sure most of you don't get out of your cars and think, "Wow! I can breathe!" But for me, this is something I think of every time at this point. It is a lesson for me to listen to what feels right, to not settle for less or focus on lack, and to patiently put aside voices of authority when they do not ring with my own inner truth.

It is so nice to be a normal driver again!