Book Building Progress

For the past few weeks I've focused on my school work, but it is time for a book-building update.


BFA Project:

I have learned so much from my thesis class. I am creating images of former self-harmers and their healing process, which is the message of my book. During my last critique, my class grew so excited about my progress that it became one of the most touching experiences of my college career.

I also had a few steps back. Each portrait is six feet tall, and while dealing with some of the paper, I wrinkled one of them and ripped another. My best efforts to fix the paper failed.

Last night, I ordered another roll of paper. Despite the unexpected cost of money and time, I will make it work. In fact, this purchase might be for the best, because I have more ideas for the next big project.


Writing:

In my magazine article writing class, I had my peer group evaluate writing taken straight from my book. Their response felt both tactful and constructive. Even as confident as I feel with my writing, I welcome improvements.


Public Speaking:

I volunteered to speak on the first day of my public speaking class's persuasion speeches. I stayed up until about two last night--I could have managed my time much better preparing for this one. Yet I still feel I did well. Not quite as well as my first speech, but in some ways I also improved. I paced a bit during my first speech, and this one I felt more natural.

I wrote my speech to persuade people to take accountability for their own happiness--a direct message of Cutting Free. I opened by speaking about someone I had tried to work out a romantic relationship with for the past five years. The way he abruptly bailed on me, all over a cold text message, left me so upset I considered dropping out of school this semester.

Yet what would that accomplish? Yes, I had many doubts about myself and my capabilities, but this person does not deserve that much power!

My speech had three main points:

We are responsible for our own happiness.

We create our happiness rapidly by a technique called flooding, doing whatever we can to make ourselves feel proud.

We find meaning in our pain through this process, and eventually feel so good about the changes in our lives, we are grateful for the pain in the first place.


Happiness:

This is my personal example of flooding yesterday. I am not out of the woods yet--I still have much anger and sadness I am dealing with, but I AM dealing with it rather than lying in bed all day. Yesterday in my swimming class, we spent the hour swimming laps, and toward the end I had an itch to practice one of my greatest weaknesses. We have been doing flip turns--that is, most people have been doing flip turns. I would start lowering down and then feel like water was creeping through my ears into my skull and I was about to drown.

The idea of flipping around, even in water, felt so foreign and scary to me. But yesterday, after many attempts and the encouragement of the beginners in my lane, I did it! I didn't even realize I did it in fact until they started congratulating me. Then I spent the end of class practicing. I haven't yet incorporated it into swimming yet, but knowing I can flip underwater feels like such a leap forward!